


who's left?

by balimaria



Series: Bali's Dream SMP Fics [10]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Dead Wilbur Soot, Dream Team SMP Spoilers, Gen, Ghost Wilbur Soot, Hurt No Comfort, One Shot, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Tommy really be crushing everyone's hearts huh, TommyInnit Angst (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Misses Toby Smith | Tubbo, Villain Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:22:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27903649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/balimaria/pseuds/balimaria
Summary: He just wants someone that isn’t his dead brother, a pyromaniac, or a psychopath. Is that really so much to ask?But… no. Tubbo exiled him. Phil killed Wilbur. Techno betrayed L’manburg.So who was left?----AKA This moment made me cry
Relationships: Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: Bali's Dream SMP Fics [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2043604
Comments: 28
Kudos: 546





	who's left?

The air around him is scorching. Tommy can feel sweat beading across his brow. His armor is much too heavy. Ghostbur laughs at something Sapnap said. Dream joins in and the three of them walk into the Nether hub like it was the easiest thing in the world. They’re going to see the Christmas tree. 

“Dream, can I see the Christmas tree?”

It’s the fifth time he’s asked. The answer is always the same.

“If you go through the portal, I will kill you.”

“I want to see my friends for Christmas.”

“You can’t.”

An apology in his eyes, Ghostbur promises him a polaroid. He and Sapnap and Dream vanish into the portal.

Tommy doesn’t want a polaroid. He doesn’t want his home to be a memory. 

A chill wracks his body despite the heat. Tommy turns away from the portal, not wanting to look at it for a second longer.

The hub is located above a fairly large lava lake. Spikes of basalt and blackstone padded between layers and layers of netherrack stretch out for more chunks then Tommy can even begin to imagine. It looks kind of cool. Mostly it doesn't look like anything.

His armor is smothering him. He takes it off and sets it to the side, then sits down next to it. His legs dangle out over the molten lake. Tommy wonders if this is how Wilbur felt before he died. Like something was scraping away at his ribs, hollowing him out until he was nothing but cobwebs and darkness and the bloody remains of who he used to be. He hugs himself. The chill only settles deeper into his skin. He just wants someone that isn’t his dead brother, a pyromaniac, or a psychopath. Is that really so much to ask?

But… no. Tubbo exiled him. Phil killed Wilbur. Techno betrayed L’manburg. 

So who was left?

Tommy scrambles away from the edge, jolting to his feet. Fear runs wild through his veins. Who was left? Genuinely. _Who was left?_

_No one._

His fear drains into nothing. The lava lake bubbles. 

Tommy wants to go home. Dream will kill him if he goes home. Tommy doesn’t want Dream to kill him. He has to find somewhere new.

His mind drifts back to Logsteadshire.

“Prison,” Sapnap called it.

“A vacation,” Dream corrected.

Dream will kill him if he goes home. He’ll lose his mind anywhere else.

Cautiously, Tommy shifts closer to the edge of the platform. He can feel the heat rising from the lake, even at his height.

One life left. Dream had been the end of his first two.

Tommy doesn’t want him to be his last.

In one impulsive moment he squeezes his eyes shut and grits his teeth and puts one foot out over the edge-

A hand snaps around his shirt, throwing him back onto the platform. Tommy lands with a grunt, his head spinning. Eventually the pain fades and he forces himself to his knees, one hand pressed against his forehead. 

His gaze flicks upwards.

A white porcelain mask smiles down at him. Cold settles back into his skin.

Dream offers his hand. Tommy makes it a point to slap it aside and stand himself. As always, Dream does the exact opposite of everything he wants.

His gloved hand feels like fire against his shoulder.

“It’s not your time to die.”

Tommy growls and shoves Dream’s hand away.

“It’s never my time to die.”

The portal wooshes with the return of Ghostbur and Sapnap. They’re laughing. The sound feels like a corkscrew drilling into his brain. Dream guides them all back to Logsteadshire. Wilbur gives him a polaroid of the Christmas tree. Tommy tosses it into the lava when he’s not looking.

They arrive at the portal that leads back to the camp. Tommy steps inside, barely feeling the churning in his stomach at the complete relocation of his entire body.

Tommy wishes, impossibly, that the portal would link and he’d step out into L’manburg. Maybe Dream wouldn’t kill him if it was an accident.

But no. His feet land against stone bricks. Tommy looks out across the watery horizon. The sun is setting, casting the ocean in a red-orange light. 

Tommy walks down to the shore and dips his toe into the water. Nothing happens.

Sapnap and Ghostbur are still chatting cheerfully when Tommy meets back up with them. Dream’s the head of the group, leading them unflinchingly towards Logsteadshire.

“How do you know when it’s too much?” he asks. Speaking feels like a knife straight through his lungs.

The conversation wavers, but doesn’t stop, though Tommy’s sure they’ve heard him.

“How do you know when it’s too much?” he repeats, louder this time, just in case.

No one answers.

Sapnap and Dream leave as soon as they’ve dropped Tommy and Ghostbur off at the camp. He watches their boat until it disappears.

=====

There’s a photograph of New L’manburg on his wall. Tommy finds himself staring at it in the light of the moon. As the hours pass the image imprints itself on against his eyelids. He sees it no matter where he looks. 

Tommy recalls a book Phil had read to him, where people could jump inside pictures and pop out at the location within them. 

_It’s a story,_ the still-rational part of his mind hisses. _It’s just fiction._

Still, Tommy pulls off the cover and stumbles over to the wall. The blurry photograph hangs, slightly crooked, from its nail. It’s not even a very good photo. Too small and framed all wrong.

Trembling, Tommy screws his eyes shut and reaches out a hand. The blurry memory of the photograph glows against his eyelids.

His hand brushes against the paper. Tommy opens his eyes.

For a moment, just a moment, he sees Tubbo. He’s wearing a smile, hand just inches away from Tommy’s own-

He blinks, and it’s gone. The cavern in his chest grows a little deeper, a little darker.

Tommy sighs, then returns to his bed. It’d been a stupid idea anyways.

**Author's Note:**

> Join the MCYT discord!
> 
> PERMANANT LINK: https://discord.gg/nj5qfunhz6


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